Letter From My Father,* 4 Days After I Moved To Sweden

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*I don’t mean to be cryptic, I just haven’t had time to explain anything, in a long time. Or post anything.  I’ve left NYC and gone “home,” to Sweden, where I grew up–a tiny island in the Stockholm archipelago called Runmaro, to be exact. Jack and Lewis (my trusted cats) ALSO moved, and the back story is a love story that stayed in the shadows for over three decades as a friendship story. That too, I will explain. Because I want to, I mean. The same way I want to share this private letter from my father, because time is running out, and words should bring hope and spark with love or not be at all. We’ve been here 4 days. The Baltic Sea is whistling in the background. This is the only place in my whole life where I ever felt truly safe. Oh! And Åke lets me pilot the motorboat now, between the islands. (After 32 years, during which, we never considered it.)

I could easily become boastful as all get out after even the slightest sea-or boat related triumph, but thank you in advance for bearing with all the strange dots of this website and its frayed editor.

And let me know how you feel about amateur boating stories?




Dearest Celia,

It makes me proud and happy that someone of your high caliber can be lifted
by messages from me! I’ve long been lifted by the rainbows of postcards and
telegrams and the like from you and never moreso than right now that you’re
off onto what I regard as a brilliant and courageous adventure. Did you
ever watch goldfish sucking oxygen from the side of a tank? That’s what I
do with all your communications. My mind has already confected and
catalogued at least fifty different “pictures” and impressions of you
carrying lumber across that magic little island of yours!

Be well and let me hear from you when it’s opportune! Meanwhile, continued
good things to all of you and may the mighty Atlantic Ocean fail in its
perverse effort to keep us apart!
Much Love,


9 thoughts on “Letter From My Father,* 4 Days After I Moved To Sweden”

  1. It sounds like there’s a book in that back story – a contemporary romance infused with a monumental struggle to remain intact through a career of attempted attrition through the agency of corporate character assassins.
    That is, of course, if it’s something you’d be willing to share…
    The love interest has remained constant and peripheral like a moon in your orbit exerting subtle yet inexorable influence on the tides of your being?
    I get the feeling that there’s a happy ending in this for us all somewhere…

    1. Brother Paul, I get the feeling that there’s an ideally brutal, reliably mechanistic way to monumentally torture and monumentally terminate an ongoing contemporary romance, in short order. [keywords: “ideally brutal”.]

      That way would be as follows:

      One partner in a real-life, real-time contemporary romance, confines himself/herself to the extremely exclusionary labors, and the monumentally disruptive and disorienting extended isolations, which proceed from committing oneself to the hellishly backward-facing and bloody-kneed crawl “through a career of attempted attrition through the agency of corporate character assassins”; to write it all down, and to fantasize delusions in which a world of readers will make all that monumentally romance-torturing and romance-terminating labor worthwhile by lining up to get their books signed; instead of his/her indulging himself/herself with the daily dancing in, reveling in, and reverencing of the minute-by-minute real-time moments of the Romantic Now, always and ever-more joyously basking in the movements of the ever-present into future-ascendant, life-ascendant, light-ascendant, love-abundant bliss.


  2. Celia,
    We will miss you.
    Perhaps we will visit you some day.
    Gordon is of Swedish heritage and Ace has always wanted to speak Swedish.
    Love to you from us.

  3. I love that you’re in the only place where you’ve ever felt truly safe.
    I love amateur boating stories.
    I love your father’s letter.
    Most of all, I love that you now have a love story of your own.

    All possible treasures of love, I hope will be discovered by you and Åke, throughout your soul-sailors’ journey over many years of the horizons within two hearts.

    Bon voyage, dear one.

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